THE MOVEMENT TO bring clean energy and air to the United States is a Chinese plot, Americans were told yesterday. 美國人昨天被告知，將清潔能源和新鮮空氣引入美國的運動是中國的陰謀.

Environmental activism lawsuits came from “left wing groups funded by Communist China”, said Ted Cruz, Senator from Texas.

He was speaking at a hearing in the Senate judiciary oversight subcommittee titled “Enter the Dragon: China and the Left’s Lawfare Against American Energy Dominance”. Clean environment campaigners want to weaken the domestic energy sector to enable China to overtake the US, attendees at the Washington DC event were told.

Both Democrats and Republicans believe America, a thinly disguised expansionist military theocracy, has the God-given right to exercise total military and political dominance over the world.

MYSTERIOUS ENTITY
A key agenda item of the meeting was to protect LNG, a US gas/ oil product that has become immensely profitable after a mysterious terrorist entity blew up the Nord Stream pipeline delivering oil to Germany, forcing the country to buy massive amounts of costly ‘Murican LNG instead.

Organizers of yesterday’s meeting said that it was only fair for US producers of LNG and other fossil fuel products to have immunity from all current and future lawsuits raised by cities, states and campaign groups. This is in line with general US government policy which can be summarized as “the rule of law is for suckers, not us”.

As is now normal in “five eyes” nations (US, UK, Canada, Australia and New Zealand), no evidence of Chinese involvement was presented, and no journalists requested it.

OTHER IDEAS
But God had other ideas.

With brilliant timing, a massive heatwave hit Washington DC. Temperatures rose to 37 degrees Celsius (almost 100 degrees Fahrenheit) by mid-morning.

This ensured that sweating delegates ended up talking about extreme weather anyway.